Is this the most boring Reality Show contestant ever? 19:02

It’s been standard knockoff fare from the start – sub Big Brother shit featuring a merry band of whining prima-donnas desperate for their moment in the sun.

However up until now at least reality producers have bothered to make an effort when they cast their future z listers. This time around, it looks like they knocked off at 3 to go to the pub, leaving some idiot researcher to OK contestant number 6.

“Ladies and gentlemen….Claire!”

Jesus – the most empty, charisma free waste of space ever to grace a so called ‘entertainment show’.

At least the other two girls on the WKS coach are camera friendly – the hot blonde, and the hot brunette. You can see what the producers were thinking – them two are category A gossip mag fodder – but Claire… Claire??

What does she offer?

“I love pop music! “ “Jonathon is the one!” “Look at my promise band!”

SHUT UP! Not only is she blessed with a dress that’d make your gran cringe she’s like an entertainment black hole – her goody goody mummy’s girl act sucking any fun, enthusiasm or joy into an infinite point of dull.

You can just see the guys on the bus glazing over every time she comes into view, in fact I think I speak for the entire male population when I congratulate Jonathon (who sounds like a giant tool anyway) for slipping that ring on her finger.

Promise Ring? The only promise Jonathon wants from Claire is to keep her bag lady clothes on. Having said that, should Claire really push the boat out and actually have more than two drinks, the sight of her naked should be contraception enough…

That's the way to do it! 09:22

A rare moment of entertainment in Big Brother these last couple of days, thanks to Wolf-man Marcus. First up the deeply creepy one throws a total tantrum when BB gently ribs him as part of one of his cringe-inducing tasks. He'd wittered previously about BB taking an 'awesome photo' of him, making him look like 'a complete top boy' (not humanly possible - even with photo shop). Obviously embarrassed at the revelation to 2 million people that he'd said something impossibly twatty (Oh yeah, the cameras pick up everything), he reverted to playground and smashed up the diary room.But the best bit was when he eventually, sheepishly crawled back to the diary room to apologise. Only his apology took the form of a deranged lecture to BB about how, if he were producing, he'd make such a better go of it. "I know what makes great telly and I offered you gold - you didn't take it".

Finally,we are here. The contestants think they can produce a better show than the producers. The lunatics are taking over the asylum. Inevitable really.

When will they learn? 13:24

I'm amused to hear the Who Killed Summer 'innocent', Claire, whingeing about how she's worried about how fellow contestant, Emma, might be perceived. Where have these people been before they take part in such shows? A cardboard box? Or, maybe in Claire's case, tucked up in bible class - away from the harmful realities of modern life.

She furrows her brow and does a good stab at real worry when she says to Kian 'I'm just worried about how she's coming across'. Note to Claire - turn your worry a little closer to home dear. Emma might be many things, but she clearly gets that the cameras are on her. The question is Claire - what do the viewers make of you?

Dumb and dumber? 22:25

So this Who Killed Summer malarkey is shaping up to be quite a classic. Grudgingly I have to admit to finding these 6 wannabes a fraction more watchable than the doozies on Big Brother. Maybe I'm having a rare moment of philanthropy, but I'd even go so far as to say that a couple are vaguely likeable (I know, I know - call it sunstroke)

My gripe at the moment is with the reets producing this. Check out the contestant's 'task' this week!

Jesus, how many researchers on travel expenses does it take to come up with 'challenges' like these? Get autographs. Biggest names make you the winner - duh!

Nice to see Liam Gallagher hasn't evolved one iota though - like Cheddar cheese or the wheel - some things in life are just reassuringly...constant.

Brand New Targets - hurrah! 11:07

Just when I was about to suffer serious reality-hating withdrawl symptoms (Big Brother being so dull it doesn't merit comment) - this pops up

Oh. My. God. This looks set to mark a new bench in reality programming. It's early days, only the first 4 min episode has gone out, but already I can see how this one looks set to be the perfect target.

We have the full gamut of wannabe's: The show-off; the babe; the he-man; the square; the token exotic and the thinker.

Apparently, the plan is to send them off on one endless party - hitting festivals, gigs, parties etc over the summer and, get this, seeing which one is still standing! Which researcher on £10 travel expenses p/w came up with this gem!?

Could this be the final nail in reality's coffin?