Isn't it nice meeting old friends... 13:19

You've got to love Facebook eh Emma?

Without it you'd probably lose touch with all your old friends from back in the day.

Dear old chums like Lauren here might never have been able to track you down and pay you a surprise visit would they?

And I'm sure you would have been gutted to have missed such a happy reunion like this one.

Of course, not everyone likes to hold onto their past.

Some people actually have pasts that they would choose to forget.

Some people have buried their pasts and reinvented themselves, and actually the very last thing they want is for skeletons to come out of that closet.

Painful memories...events that, in their mind,might really screw things up for them if they got out.

But, that's not you is it Emma. I'm sure you'd like to pat the person on the back that so diligently tracked down your old pal Lauren and told her where you were and what you were doing nowadays.

Think nothing of it. Happy to help x

Let me spell this out... 13:40

Because maybe, just maybe things aren't clear enough.

Hi I'm Claire. I'm a virgin. I'm going to ram this fact down your throats for eight weeks. But i'm weak. I'm desperate. And I'm only wearing this ring because without it I am nothing... charmless, bland, boring. No one.

What Promise Ring? 17:15

Tut, tut, tut...

It looks like Who Killed Summer's resident bible-bashing virgin, Claire, isn't quite the undriven snow scape she has gone to such lengths throughout this series to convince us she is. In fact, as the evidence here clearly shows us, she is more voracious nymph than virgin bride...

So who's your new friend Claire? Because it certainly doesn't look like the boyfriend you've been boring everyone to near suicide with, by endlessly droning on about these last weeks.

That's right folks, even those amongst us brandishing 'promise rings' - today's equivalent of the chastity belt - aren't quite the 'never been kissed brides' they assure their other halves (that's you Jonathan) they are.

No siree - and all it took was a naff make-over from her fellow contestants; the loan of a slapper's dress courtesy of Emma and a skin full of alcopops at a nearby nightclub and she was practically dragging this poor lump back to her hotel room for..?

Well, let's just say that the room echoed to the sound of ecstatic, orgasmic groans for a good couple of hours before the exhausted stud made good his exit...

Oh, and Claire - there one thing that God loathes even more than a harlot and that's a hypocrite.

Who Killed the vibe? 20:41

Get me off this bus and away from these idiots!

This lot really don't like each other. I'm loving it. They obviously signed up for what they thought would be one endless VIP party, and found themselves lumped together in close confinement with a bunch of their worst nightmares. And now they have to endure it for nearly 2 solid months!! It's like a bizarre version of 'Survivor'.

Oh yes, things are really hotting up between the busmates:

Emma hates Claire's goody two-shoes behaviour.

Dieter's hippy-dippy lifestyle is annoying everyone.

Tete's mysteriouly spending a lot of time in 'the toilets' these days.

And Kian and Jude are fighting over leadership.

I predict we are inches away from a proper ruck!

Finally, now the entertainment starts!

The WKS paranoia grows 08:53

Who is it bus-mates? Who's watching you....

I can see you Claire.

I'm watching you Tete...

Kian, don't think you aren't being overseen

Dieter, that's revolting

I saw that Jude

Emma, the walls have eyes.

11 down... 08:48

Fascinating article on thewrap.com. Some boffin has done the research and concluded that since reality TV began all those years ago (roughly agreeded to be when BB started) that no less than 11 fragile contestants have tried to top themselves once the music stops.

Once again bolstering my point: these puppets shouldn't take part in this shit. Reality TV is seriously dangerous for your health weak people.

Wonder how long now until we can tally a list of those MURDERED on reality TV?

BTR gets starring role 22:28

Back to this summer's most bizarre reality effort, Who Killed Summer. Contestants here are using this blog as it's sick note, it's excuse to teacher. Not one episode goes past when this lot don't obssess about what's posted here? What can we say - glad to be of service.

In today's episode, loathsome wannabe reality hero Kian rallies his raggle taggle troupe into mutiny - telling the producers to basically piss off and that the six of them will be doing one for a few days! I have to admit - reality TV GOLD! The contestants demand a weekend break??!! And get one! Genius.

He pretends to be reading from everyone's favourite blog, yours truly, blagging that we've been leaked information and written about the conflict, with mystic meg-like accuracy.

There's no denying it - our little posts about their banal, vacant goings on have certainly put the wind up them - it's like watching a bunch of students descend into a bad trip - paranoia flying around like a cloud of bats. They are convinced that one of the production crew are feeding me a steady stream of pics and secret footage, all less than flattering, juicy stuff. Which, of course, I can neither confirm or deny.

This is quite a nice new feeling - directly influencing these gormless puppets myself - BTR produces WKS...this I like..